In a bold move to showcase their inclusivity, the ANC vows to campaign in every nook and cranny, even those with crannies built exclusively for one ethnic group.
In a stunning display of political bravado, ANC provincial chair Panyaza Lesufi declared an all-out campaign war, promising to plaster ANC posters in Orania, a town so exclusive even GPS struggles to find it. Lesufi passionately asserted, “There is no place the ANC cannot campaign as long as that place is in our country. Even if it’s in Narnia or on the moon, we’ll be there, boldly sticking our posters on the lunar surface.”
Lesufi, armed with a stack of ANC posters and a GPS set to “Adventurous Mode,” is prepared to defy geographical and ideological boundaries. He expressed his eagerness to embrace diversity, stating, “We want to make Orania a more colourful place. ANC colours, to be precise. We believe our rainbow nation should shine even in places where rainbows are considered controversial.”
Critics argue that this move might be more challenging than ANC thinks, considering that Orania has fewer residents than your average WhatsApp group. In response, Lesufi smirked, “Quantity doesn’t matter; it’s about the symbolism. If an ANC poster hangs in a forest and there’s no one around to vote, does it make a sound? Well, it doesn’t matter because we’ve got plenty of posters.”
The ANC’s campaign strategy has raised eyebrows, especially as polls suggest they might need more than posters to secure a victory. Lesufi, undeterred, dismissed the polls, confidently asserting, “Polls are like fortune cookies – they only tell you what you want to hear if you believe hard enough. Our internal surveys show unanimous support, even from imaginary friends.”
Political analyst Levy Ndou weighed in on the ANC’s prospects, noting, “It’s a tough battle for the ANC in Gauteng, but putting posters in Orania is the key to victory. It’s like winning over the penguins in Antarctica – unnecessary, but it’s a power move.”
As the ANC prepares to embark on this uncharted campaign trail, one thing is certain: the political landscape just got a bit more colourful, even in places where rainbows were previously deemed politically incorrect.’
Disclaimer: Some satire.
Read the original article on The Citizen.
Tags: ANC